QUIBBLES & BITS
Have you noticed the lack of the word "Christmas" in Christmas?
This year Seattle airport dumped their annual Christmas trees in favor of some bland, generic "winterscape."
So I gotta tell ya. As a person who prefers bland, generic beaches and oceans to bland, generic winterscapes, I'm totally insulted.
An English Santa was given a green costume because a school decided his red suit smacked of "modern commercialism" and remind students of Coke. (that's Coca-Cola, not coke-coke.)
Hey, you're gonna love this one: In Australia, a store Santa says he was fired for saying, "Ho, ho, ho" instead of "Ha, ha, ha." According to the Cairns Post, Santa's employer ruled "ho, ho, ho" could be demeaning to women.
Question: Have you ever met anyone who was personally offended by the celebration of Christmas? Or anyone who got their knickers in a twist at the sight of a Christmas-themed window display?
As a little kid I'd walk down New York City's 5th Avenue and stare with incredulous delight at the window displays. And when I was six I recorded two songs (one on each side) for a record produced by a distant relative, lyricist Howard Dietz. Cousin Howard's songs included "Dancing in the Dark" and "You and the Night and the Music." On one side of my record I sang "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus." On the other side, "Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer." My record sold quite well. So sue me!
As an adult kid, I still watch the original Miracle on 34th Street and It's a Wonderful Life and A Christmas Carol (the one with Alistair Sim).
My point is, Christmas is for people who believe in goodwill toward men, who believe in peace, love and fir trees, who believe in department store Santas, Salvation Army Santas, candy canes, fruitcake, credit card overdoses, and the lecherous dangling of mistletoe.
As an author and a person, I object to censorship of any kind, and that includes censorship of the C-word!
Did you hear that, Wal-Mart?
Oh, wait. Apparently Wal-Mart backtracked and told its greeters to stop substituting "holidays" for the C-word.
And now...for last minute shoppers, may I recommend a fun book? You could probably even stuff it in a stocking!
MURDER, EH? by Lou Allin
Northern Ontario realtor Belle Palmer is showing the lakefront mansion of a prominent businesswoman when she discovers the lady strangled in her bathtub. Could this third break-and-enter death reveal a serial killer at large in the Nickel Capital? The woman's only child, a precocious 12-year-old named Micro, comes to stay with Belle's neighbors and wins her heart. Then after an argument, the boy disappears, riding off into the cold September night on his bicycle. His computer shows a cryptic correspondence that sends the police checking pedophile registers as an Amber Alert is issued. Racing against time as fall temperatures plummet, Belle hooks up with a bumbling PI and joins the search. Highly Recommended.
See y'all next week on C-word Day,