by Barbara Poelle
In reading Susan Casey’s comprehensive and compelling work on global wave influence and the impact said water behavior has on costal and environmental markers, one is both engaged and awed with her prose. THE WAVE is one of the finest non-fiction books in a long time, combining science, passion and education in a fascinating rhetoric that bares consideration, and I encourage citizens of America, nay of EARTH, to read it.
Okay, so that was smart talky book stuff right? Okay, good. Because now I am going to spend the rest of the blog announcing:
THE SHARKTOPUS RULES.
Oh, you thought mayhap I forgot? NAY GOOD FRIENDS!!! September 25th has been circled on my calendar in DRIPPING RED INK since principal photography began.
Don’t forget: You may utilize any beverage for the consumption- we encourage teetotalers and pregnant ladies and minors to play, as we are an equal opportunity good time. In fact, we played a similar game with my Minnesota BFFs and their kids using Gatorade and we all laughed so hard that one of us wet our pants.
Don’t worry about which of us did so- I’m just sayin’.
And so, without further ado, I present the drinking game forever to be known as:
THE SHARKTOPUS RULES.
1. Any actor saying, aghast, “What could have done this?” or a variation thereof: DRINK.
2.In Sharktopus, there is a character called "Captain Jack." Whenever someone says "Captain Jack" in the movie, the first person to shout "Sparrow!" after, gets to make someone ELSE drink.
3. Every time the Sharktopus comes on land, thus inexplicably exposing its gills yet not suffocating: DRINK
4. As the Sharktopus approaches his next victim, predict how many tentacles will surface in the attack. You must take one drink for every tentacle you're off.
5. When any overt sexuality is punished by the Sweet Fangs of Sharktopus Death: DRINK."
6. Every time you think Eric Roberts is having an insane bout of career envy concerning his sister: DRINK*
*(I encourage you to indeed keep Gatorade on hand for this one, as that rule would be in play more or less constantly, and thus be fatal.)
Now, as you will note, I only have six rules, and any good rule book should have 7. I would like to challenge you, my dear friends, to come up with the perfect seventh rule in the comments section. The winner (as judged by Amy Lindel on Friday morning) will be announced in the comments and receive a copy of the murderously delightful and laugh out loud Austen-winking cozy, Tracy Kiely’s MURDER ON THE BRIDE’S SIDE. And a bonus: BANISHED, from that effervescent crime fiction author turned YA novelist Sophie Littlefield, which won’t hit the shelves for three more weeks!
And to each of you on Saturday night, I raise my glass to celebrate what is sure to be an historic occasion.
I’ll bring my plastic drop cloth.
TheLindelSpin: When a great writer comes chocolate-coated in that much crazy, it's not worth the emotional calories.
