*The tacit acceptance that "serious," no matter how poorly executed, is better than "silly."
*The fact that foods that taste marvelous don't spread through your body, eliminating fat.
*Anyone of ANY religion who decides that if you disagree with them, they can kill you.
*The deterioration of punctuation--is "it's" REALLY that hard to figure out?
*The demise of newspapers in my lifetime: yeah, the Internet's faster. That's not better; it's just faster. McDonald's is faster than a filet mignon--does that make it BETTER?
*Football.
*The idea that a group--let's say gay people--should be met with "tolerance." There's nothing that says "warmth and understanding" better than being TOLERATED, no?
*Jingoism. "America's the GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD!!!" Well, so what? And at what are we "greatest?" I'm willing to bet the French beat us at crepe-making, hands down.
*Reality TV. Yes, ALL reality TV.
*Exercise. Yeah, I said it.
*Fish. Well, EATING fish. They can swim around all they want and it won't bother me a bit.
*Winter. Cold, snow, ice, sleet, wind, freezing rain. "Winter wonderland?" What drugs were THOSE people on?
*While we're at it, Christmas music. Yes, even that one.
*People dying. I'm against it.
*The fact that there will never, EVER, be a new Marx Brothers movie. What a drag.
*Desserts that don't have chocolate in them. What's the point?
*The fact that everybody can't buy every book. It would make life SO much simpler.
*The squeaking sound that styrofoam makes. Even typing that gives me shivers.
*My children getting older. Whose idea was THAT?
*Fake memoirists. Just label it "fiction" and move on, okay?
*Did I mention exercise?
*The phrase "humorous cozy." (See previous posts for elaboration.)
*The baseball off-season.
*The fact that John Lennon has been dead for 28 years, and counting.
*Hate. That's right, I hate hate. Go figure.
Did I miss anything? What do YOU hate?
Gee, you pretty much covered it all. I especially like the "Jingoism" example. Seems to me the people who shout "AMERICA IS THE GREATEST" the loudest have never been anywhere else. (And hating exercise can't be emphasized enough, either. Yes, I did just get a treadmill. Have been on it twice. I hate it.)
Posted by: Account Deleted | January 05, 2009 at 10:17 AM
I know, Lorraine. I exercise every day, and every day I hate it. This "endorphin rush" they talk about is a myth, like death benefits and compassionate conservatism.
Posted by: Jeff Cohen | January 05, 2009 at 10:32 AM
Aside from the lack of physical similarities we might have been twins separated at birth!
Although I do like yoga and pilates... but that's really stretching, not excercise, right?
Posted by: lianabrooks.blogspot.com | January 05, 2009 at 05:37 PM
I would have gone with yoga, but pilates... nope. That's exercise. Sorry.
Posted by: Jeff Cohen | January 05, 2009 at 05:41 PM