Battle of the Sidekicks!

Robin Agnew

Three of the most appealing sidekicks through all of mystery fiction are certainly Hawk, Joe Pike, and Winn, the psycho-WASP. Maybe appealing isn’t the totally right word, but they are strangely fascinating. I was pondering, during a recent five hour drive, the different ways they stack up.

TATS

Hawk: None known.

Pike: Two red arrows pointing forward. He got them in ‘Nam. Say no more.

Winn: WASPs don’t have Tats. Please.

CLOTHING

Hawk: Sweatsuits, gold chains. Sweatsuit unzipped to show off Hawk’s apparently awesome pecs.

Pike: Jeans & a t-shirt. Maybe a couple pairs and a couple shirts, but probably all the same. Essential: mirrored sunglasses.

Winn: Chinos & button downs, maybe a polo shirt, maybe a (blue) blazer. Are there other kinds of clothes? I have a feeling he might wear one of those needlepoint belts on occasion.

WOMEN

Hawk: Yes

Pike: Unknown

Winn: LOTS

SKILLS

Hawk: Back-up or front man in any gunfight. Looks scary enough that lots of people don’t mess with him anyway. He does stuff Spenser doesn’t want to do (stuff that goes against the White Knight code).

Pike: Name it. Killing is no problem, disabling, protection. In the latest outing he has to juggle a battle and a baby. Elvis doesn’t have quite the same scruples Spenser seems to be burdened with, though he has plenty.

Winn: Again, name it. Some of his skills are varied and surprising, but they’re always useful to Myron (see Hawk, same reason).

LOYALTY

Hawk: No question, though he’s known to side with Susan S.

Pike: Dumb question.

Winn: Luckily for Myron.

CONVERSATIONAL SKILLS

Hawk: Way amusing, terse, to the point.

Pike: None known.

Winn: By far the funniest of the sidekicks, as far as I’m concerned. Don’t let him hear YOU say that.

SMARTER THAN THEIR BOSSES?

Hawk: Usually.

Pike: Almost always, but Elvis has better social skills.

Winn: Maybe a smidge, but see above. Myron is simply better socialized, not being a psychopath and all.

And they are INDISPENSIBLE. The series just wouldn’t be as cool without these guys, and the authors are smart enough to leave a reader wanting more of them. Who’s the baddest ass? As far as I’m concerned it’s a tie but I’d love to know what you think…