Sit On It, Fonzie

Jeff Cohen

The time comes in every author's life, and it is one that we try to put off as long as possible. It's not something we like to consider, nor to talk about, but it is inevitable, and never convenient.

I need a new writing chair.

Now, you might be thinking, "That's not much of a problem. I can't see why this guy would devote an entire blog post to a chair." And you'd have a point. But there are mitigating circumstances that, you know, mitigate this situation:

1. A writer spends an inordinate amount of time in his/her chair;
2. Those of us past the age of, let's say, 40, are susceptible to back ailments, carpal tunnel and other serious maladies when we spend too much time sitting in a position that is not properly aligned;
3. A writer thinking about discomfort will not write as well;
4. Bottom line: I had nothing to write about this week.

I'm not one of those authors who gets all weepy and nostalgic about objects, at least not the ones I use for my job. The chair I'm in has served well and long, but it has a ripped armrest, a squeaky base and a very clunky lean-back feature. It needs to go.

You'd be amazed how difficult it is to find a decent writing chair these days. Or perhaps you wouldn't. I have no idea how long it's been since you tried it. For all I know, you're in the chair business full time and are much better versed on the subject than I am. You're probably just waiting for me to make some sort of chair-related factual error, so you can pounce on it and prove how hideously ill-informed I am.

I'm sorry; what were we talking about? Oh yes. A chair.

This is not the kind of thing one can buy online. A chair has to be at least momentarily test driven before a purchase. Something seen in a picture on a website could look just fine and fit into the budget, but might be so hard, so stiff or so generally uncomfortable as to make all the other things irrelevant.

Aesthetics are secondary. When I asked my wife and daughter about a second model of a chair I was considering, one that was $40 less because it was a different color, each of them said, "Who cares what it looks like? It's a chair."

I spent the afternoon before Thanksgiving stalking chairs with my children, who were along for the ride and (what was for them) a free lunch. And we went to one of the office supply chain stores where I had a credit account. The place (which shall remain nameless--it was Office Depot) was fully stocked in the "executive chair" section.

 It took some major sitting to finally settle on one particular chair, which admittedly was a close facsimile of my current one. The price was reasonable, assuming that one's definition of "reasonable" is stretched to the late-2011 level. They even had one in stock. I handed over my Unnamed-yet-Office-Depot card to pay for it after the obliging store employee showing me the chair had handtrucked it to the front of the store.

And then my card was declined because I didn't have a balance on it. Apparently, I don't use my card enough for them to bother giving me credit when I actually want to buy something from them. I didn't have another card I wanted to use, so we're back to square one.

A writer's workspace--like anyone else's, when you think about it--is a huge part of the work day. My chair is important because I don't want to notice it; it should not distract me from what I'm doing. Same as my mousepad, my clock (does anyone actually use a regular clock anymore?), my file cabinets and my completely inadequate shelf space. It's not that I wouldn't be able to write without them; it's that the right ones make the task less diffused. It becomes easier to concentrate.

So once I find the right chair, I can finish this next book. 

Yup. That's the excuse I'm using today. 

Comments

[Patty Andersen]

For once I have a great chair at work, and a pretty good one for the computer in my bedroom/office. My living room chair is great to sit in but it isn't a great reclining chair. Amazing how much a bad chair can affect your life and as an author I imagine it is even more important to you. Good luck in tracking down the "perfect" chair.

[Theresa de Valence]

Well, Jeff, about 10 years ago, more really, I had the same problem.

I bought a chair. It was delivered near the weekend. There was some business strife, so I spent 9 hours in the chair Saturday and Sunday in front of my computer without any discomfort. Which was a first.

With a really small office, I wanted to nip in the bud any ideas people might have about wanting a similar chair for themselves.

So I called a meeting Monday morning and told everyone that the chair was more expensive than God and I had paid for it out of my wages, and if they wanted to do the same, they might have a chair also.

Some while later the bookkeeper got around to processing current invoices.

"What is this?" she stormed into my office. "Look at this price." She gave me the eye, then slowly smiled. "Will it have sex?"

So, here's the good news. In the modern day, the chair is cheaper by more than three times, and that doesn't count inflation.

There are a lot of reasons why this chair is worthwhile and I'll go into detail offline if you want to know. The most important part, not surprisingly, is the posture it puts you in and the preventative carpal tunnel support it provides. Here ya go:
http://www.humanscale.com/products/product_detail.cfm?group=FreedomTaskChairWithHeadrest

And yes, it's possible to fall asleep at your desk in this chair.

Cheers,
Theresa

[Jeff Cohen]

Sounds like a great chair, Theresa. Thanks for the story and the link. But at those prices, it's going to have to do a lot more than hold me up.

[William Doonan]

How about one of those treadmill desks? You have the desk raised so that you can do your work standing up, moving at a slow one mile per-hour, but still exercising. I've always thought about doing this but I worry that deep down I like sitting too much.

William Doonan
www.williamdoonan.com

[Theresa de Valence]

A friend of mine, who is a lawyer, dictates his briefs from a treadmill. Uses software (called Dragon) which gets tailored to one's voice. Would be an interesting way to keep the internal editor silent, wouldn't it!

Oh, and Jeff, if you were to buy one, you'll never have to buy another chair!

[Sam Thomas]

Another vote for the a change of desks rather than chairs. I don't know about the treadmill, but a friend with a Geekdesk (I think) swears by it.

As I keep saying to my wife, "When the foreign rights come in!"

[Lynne Patrick]

Jeff, honey, you need an excuse?
Wash the breakfast dishes.
Go to the funeral of someone you hardly knew.
Sort out the bathroom cupboard with 20-year-old cleaning stuff lurking at the back.
Buying a new chair is real work, not an excuse.

[Toni Lotempio]

I totally sympathize, I need a new chair too, Jeff. Rocco's claws have ruined the last one and the back is broken.....maybe someday soon, if JG sells my book....